A little late on my V day posting but when you are in love as they say V day is everyday... I asked my friend Fanta Solange Diallo who just got married last year to her Cap Verdean husband Walter to tell me what that day meant to her...
Here it comes again! V-day… no, not Victory Day, Valentine’s Day, the BIG romantic yearly holiday for all, where we all are supposed to be, represent, exude, or feel some kind of love…Whether single, paired up, tripled up (or any combination thereof), happy, not-so-happy, straight-up-in-a-pissy-mood,
No stranger to the hype, I spent most of my teenage and young adult years catering to it. Every year for the dreaded V-Day, I’d have my hair did, nails did, major shower-scrub-it-everywhere
Then, approximately 10 years later, I went and stood in front of this old priest, my mama and my daddy, and the whole world, and vowed to spend the rest of my life with one man, ONE man, granted one beautiful black brother, but yeah, the same guy, forever…And here we are, firstt V-day as a married expecting couple! You know it ain’t about ME no more, right?
So here I am, staring at my computer screen, wondering, as an older (slightly older) and more mature woman, whose vanity has now started to elude and self-love gradually colored with a deeper sense of commitment: “What the hell am I gonna do NOW???”
Yes, the hair and the nails are still getting done, so is the big scrubbing-shaving-til-your
Don’t get me wrong, I got my basis covered, girlfriend got the not-so-catholic-schoolgirl
Then it’s finally THE day, it’s a quiet, blue morning, we wake up to the chirpings of the birds outside…I point under his pillow, and he points to my shoe collection. I unwrap the lovely pearl necklace and earring set, and read the gentle words in his funny handwriting. He smiles at the kinky recipe book I got him, and chuckles at my rated PG-13 card: that’s my kind of romance, black, raw, uninhibited. I didn’t have time to put on the sexy lingerie or brush my teeth for that matter. Yet, in the air heavy with stinky breath, there was LUV, the real one, the one without the chocolates and the flowers, the one that knows it’s there to stay. No glamour, no lights, never had time to do my hair or nails (too damn cold and windy outside), just a man, a woman, a growing baby and some loud birds outside the window.
After all, it isn’t all about me, it’s better than that…It’s the stuff of every day, just a little more special so you can remember to cherish who you have, who you are and who you are becoming. So you know to thank God for the little things, right down to the stinky morning breath….(now please go on and brush your teeth…)